And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think my fart just growled at me.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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