I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
this just has baby written all over it
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
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