i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
