This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
