um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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