So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
two words: eviction party
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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