You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
