If i come over, it means nothing
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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