508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
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