so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
