he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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