And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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