omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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