Just took my morning after pill in the library
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize