oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
