remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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