Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
