Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I've blown a few things in my day
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
