He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize