i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize
