it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Randomize
