hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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