Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
