I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
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