Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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