i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
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When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
3pm strippers are depressing
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
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I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
he high fived his dick after we had sex
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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