wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
