Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
