Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
