Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
