I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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