I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
