I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
