I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i tasted like america
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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