We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
