It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
