I can't breathe out the right side of my face
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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