I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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