He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
