Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
