would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
