hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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