he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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