member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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