dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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