He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize