This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
