smell my finger.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
No subtext here. People are naked.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
