I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
