Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
how does that bad decision feel?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
